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Encrypted Document.

#1
CLASSIFIED
Enclosed is information on one: Ashley Masters. This information is privileged and any cadets of this glorious United States found snooping will be punished accordingly.
Yada Yada blabla
A gifted (I like that, praise me more!) soldier, and a tyrant to the security network. There is great interest in this Patriot's capacity for cyber-warfare and encryption. The fact I have to write up a document for a fellow Patriot in this tone and manner is a surprise to me, to us all. She is gifted, or lucky, and she is to be sent away immediately in spite of these facts. Truth be told no officer in the entire region wants to risk keeping her around, so they've tasked me with getting rid of her, diplomatically. I'm sure she understands.(?!?!)
She has hacked our mainframes, solidified our firewalls and admitted to such at risk of instant execution, in the sake of skipping bureaucracy. I'm positive her new assignment is one she will flourish in, any and all Patriot's in her path or area are urged to assist in her efforts, so long as they serve our glorious United States.

Who writes this crap?!
Physical traits to recognize the Patriot, if image does not suffice. Blonde short hair, sufficiently tall, boyish dress, blue eyes.
I'm 5'11.9"
I got a genuine article pair of Timbs
I got a nice-ass Gucci watch
uh, cool jacket too idk

(Enclosed is an image of the Patriot in question, her looks may be hideous compared to regime norms but she has urged they are.. 'Definitely camouflage.')
b7a4691ff31dbd20824f1356395ad5d9.jpg (Bro this is easily my best pic Tommy a real one out here.)
Report in question written and encrypted by Patriot-Major Thomas Jahnsen.
AND promptly edited by Ash herself! This report is shitty, I'll make it more autobiography than punishment slip huh? Shit lemme bump up this fontsize r/q. "Anyway, there's no way in hell they'll be able to hack into this bad boy once I'm done slapping my own encryption on this shit, so everyone will see my awful creative writing talent for fuck-ever!" I failed that elective sowhat?! Sue me, damn; I grew up in Brooklyn, I passed high school and got thrown into a gifted program for higher ed. Then the 'Patriots' tracked me down, aint that some shit? Anyway I got in trouble now I have to be sent away like a bad kid, aint nothin new there. What the fuck else can I ex-posit here? Favourite icecream is definitely mint choccy chip. Do the foreigners even have icecream?


[IP LOGGER TASK COMPLETED]
(You like the hacker green? Naughty little decker?)
 

Vegas

Well-known member
#6
That's really creative, actually! I like it! Good job! c:
imagine posting this unironically and thinking that this wall of nonsensical quirky drivel is 'really creative'


i guess it's pretty creative compared to the generic daddy-issue-having female character you made, lol
 

Daniel

New member
#7
imagine posting this unironically and thinking that this wall of nonsensical quirky drivel is 'really creative'


i guess it's pretty creative compared to the generic daddy-issue-having female character you made, lol
1) Was simply trying to be kind
2) At least I've actually posted a bio ;)
 
#8
imagine trying so hard to be toxic and point out cringe that you become the cringe you swore to destroy